On the Farm...

Throw a bucket of water at the chickens on the porch and they will scatter. Throw a bucket of water at the DUCKS on the porch and they give you a look that says, "And your point would be...?"

Peace Out,
~*~*~Farmer Krystal~*~*~

Things You Must Accept Part 2

Things You Must Accept Part 1

My last cow and goat died sometime last night. I realize that the purpose of the cows were food. Even though it was not their ultimate end, I would still like to honour them as though it were.

Would that you could live on the fragrance of the earth, and like an air plant be sustained by the light.

But since you must kill to eat, and rob the young of its mother's milk to quench your thirst, let it then be an act of worship,

And let your board stand an altar on which the pure and the innocent of forest and plain are sacrificed for that which is purer and still more innocent in many.

When you kill a beast say to him in your heart,

"By the same power that slays you, I to am slain; and I too shall be consumed.
For the law that delivered you into my hand shall deliver me into a mightier hand.

Your blood and my blood is naught but the sap that feeds the tree of heaven."

- Kahlil Gibran

Things You Must Accept

I know I live on a farm, and as such, things die. They die and their deaths have no meaning. One month ago I had 30 baby chicks, 3 cows and 2 goats. Now, I have no baby chicks, 1 cow and 1 goat. I found Bessie this morning and held Fillet Mignon this afternoon while he died. The goat will be dead by morning. The chickens froze to death or died from illness caused by cold that I couldn't prevent because there was no electric. The cows were all alive Tuesday morning, but died of pneumonia, also because there was no electricity for so long. One died last night that I found this morning and this afternoon another died while I did everything I could to keep him alive. I was petting him and stroking him while he died. The goat will die in the night and there is nothing I can do about.

Their deaths had no meaning and no purpose and were a waste. But thus is life on the farm.

So I've had ONE glass of wine that was refilled a few times tonight. I'm thinking about adding a couple beers to that wine.

In the morning I will watch while my other cow is lifted by a tractor and taken to the edge of my property and left for the coyotes and scavengers to eat.

And it pisses me the hell off.

Thank you, Obama, for the 100 generators you sent for the 500,000 homes without electric. Go to hell. But please screw yourself first. Your overwhelming amount of support at the black tie dinner you attended while my fellow Kentuckians FROZE TO DEATH WITHOUT HEAT will forever be etched into my mind. I hope you had a great valentines' f*cking dinner in Chicago at the cost of the American taxes payer.

Again, go to hell.


Peace Out,

~*~*~Krystal~*~*~

Friday Fragments One Day Late

Sorry this is late. My husband dominated the computer when we got home last night. This week's fragments will be told in picture with as few words as necessary.

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I start with my first blog award EVER. I won this for my Friday Fragment of Dec 19 and my escapade in chicken cleaning and dressing. Thank-you, I'm really excited! LOL!
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Plucky fit in my hand and use to sit there while I just petted and stroked him. He was killed, along with five other birds, when a couple coyotes attacked on January 1st. Plucky was was of three bodies we found. He was the only one buried. I'll really miss him. He was my favorite.

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Some of today's eggs. Yes, the first one is green.

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Homemade soap. This is cinnamon. This soap takes 2 weeks to cure.

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Firecrackers and bottle rockets work well in the snow.

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My only New Year's resolution, learn to be still.

Peace Out,

~*~*~Krystal~*~*~

The Bestest Spring Day EVER!

It is AMAZING outside! It's a perfect Spring day! It's 73 and breezy. Tomorrow it's going to be 38 in the morning. But for now, my chickens are all out and about. It's very relaxing watching them wander about scratching at the ground. Whenever I walk out there they all come running to me. Two Bits, the white rooster and King of the flock, runs to greet me when I pull into the driveway.

"She's here! Come and get it!"

"I thought he said you were going to feed us...?"

Mmmmmm...dinner... (You may take that either way, folks.)

Peace Out,

~*~*~Krystal~*~*~

You've GOT to be Kidding...RIGHT?

When I read this I just couldn't believe the absolute STUPIDITY!

Tax cows, hogs for passing gas, burping?

(Excerpts)
Belching and gaseous cows and hogs could start costing them money if a federal proposal to charge fees for air-polluting animals becomes law.

It would require farms or ranches with more than 25 dairy cows, 50 beef cattle or 200 hogs to pay an annual fee of about $175 for each dairy cow, $87.50 per head of beef cattle and $20 for each hog.

The executive vice president of the Wyoming Farm Bureau Federation, Ken Hamilton, estimated the fee would cost owners of a modest-sized cattle ranch $30,000 to $40,000 a year. He said he has talked to a number of livestock owners about the proposals, and "all have said if the fees were carried out, it would bankrupt them."

"It makes perfect sense if you are looking for ways to cut down on meat consumption and recoup environmental losses," said Bruce Friedrich, a spokesman in Washington for People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals.

It also says that they might expand it to include chicken farmers. Obviously this concerns me. We don't have that many cattle, but we ARE farmers and this is ~I~N~S~A~N~E~!

I do want to make sure I have this straight for everyone else though. People in the U.S. are struggling to pay their bills soooooo certain members of our government want to...

* prevent oil drilling in our own country so we're at the mercy of Arab nations;
* run the coal industry out of business so people's electric bills will skyrocket and force new forms of energy (of course when the people in the North and northern Midwest all freeze to death they won't NEED new forms of energy);
* and charge farmers for farting animals which will either put farmers out of business, forcing us to import food OR make the cost of milk, dairy products and beef and poultry double or triple in price OR force us all to become vegetarians.

Time to build the arsenal people...

Peace Out,

~*~*~Krystal~*~*~

Simplicity

I was inspired by THIS post by Pinky (Cheese in My Shoe) . The discussion went on about abundance and the simple things in life. So while I was out today, I took some pictures of what I consider simplicity and abundance. These bring tranquility to my life when I need it.

Tobias and George

Tobias likes to nuzzle up against my cheek. Sometimes, if I'm sitting on a step, he'll come and just rest his head on my shoulder.

Big Mac, Fillet Mignon, and Bessie

Big Mac likes to cuddle and nuzzle too. But he'll be a full grown bull end of the summer. They can be dangerous. I still think I'll have to swallow hard when it's time to send him off to slaughter. But that's farm life. I'll have this picture though to remind me of when he was a sweet 600 pound calf...

~*~*~Krystal Out~*~*~

Howard Stern Must Listen

Yes, I have a Howard Stern Must Listen video but FIRST, a little Life on the Farm.

We really hustled this morning to get out of the house by 7:17. My eldest has Algebra tutoring at 7:30 and he really needed to get there on time. Anyway, my daughter comes in right as I'm grabbing my keys and slipping my feet into White Boy's flip flops and says, "Mom, there's a chicken under the car." I heard it, but it didn't register because I needed to grab my cell phone from my room. I get near the door and Princess tells me again, "MO-OM! There's a CHICKEN under the CAR."

Sure enough. There was indeed a chicken under the car. So we caught the chicken, put her back in her coop before leaving for school. I made a quick repair with garden stakes and we were off to school. White Boy got to tutoring at 7:35. Close enough.

Howard Stern Must Listen

(Scroll down to turn the music off.)

Sorta makes you go "Hmmmmmm..." about those polls, doesn't it? What scares me even more is that this PROVES what's been being said all along. We have uneducated voters casting a ballot on November 4th based on NOTHING MORE THAN THE COLOR OF HIS SKIN.

~*~*~Krystal Out~*~*~

I'VE GOT ELECTRICITY!!

Which is a good thing. It's a lot more work to drive to town, fill five gallon buckets with water, then haul them home and carry them to the chickens and goats. Tonight it was so easy! Open the tap...out comes the water.

I was so excited that I moved one of my coops and shoveled out an entire wheel barrel full of bird turd and dumped it. It was long over do. My birds were so happy to have new ground to scratch at. They were munching away at bugs and grass and leaves on the ground. Happy chickens make happy eggs.

Best things was, I got to wash my hands afterwards...

Rambo's Escape and Capture

I came home from getting my kids to school, to the doctor, back to school, etc and headed out to feed the chickens. That's when I see Rambo hanging out around the chicken coop. Now I was on the phone with my mother and told her I had to get because HEY! Rambo attacks.


So I'm walking slowly to the chicken coop and Rambo is keeping a keen eye on me. We're just a couple feet apart and he starts warning me that I'm too close. I grab the fish net behind me, get into position, and with one fell swoop, I had Rambo in a net.


Now I know some of you are laughing at me thinking, "It's just a chicken." No. Rambo is Not "just a chicken." He's a Rooster. He's a MEAN and NASTY rooster. He has spurs on both feet that are 1 1/2 inches long. He's named Rambo for a reason. And he has his own chicken coop because Rambo does not play well with others.


I would like to eat Rambo. But Princess just cries at the thought, "Mommy! Don't kill Rambo! Don't kill Rambo! I LOOOOOOOOOOVE Rambo!"


Really. Huh.


Go hang out in his coop with him for a few minutes and let me know how much you looooooooove him after THAT! No way. No how. She's going in there. Even Bear's got issues with Rambo. and yet, somehow, Rambo lives.


In fact, Rambo is living the high life. He has a coop all to himself. It's a waste of space because I could have 8 birds in there, but again, Rambo does not play well with others.


Anyway, I found the hole in the coop and decided to fix it because I can't leave Rambo in the chicken net forever. I get my staple gun and staples and chicken wire. Can't find the long extension chord. So it's off to the local hardware store. While I was there, I bought myself one of "dem dar fancy wire cudders that's a spring loaded 'n all so my hand don't git fatigued n worn out" just because I wanted one.


I had a Milky Way Dark for lunch while I was there (girl's gotta keep her strength up).


Trouble is, I'm all tuckered out 'n' ready for a nap. Poor Rambo.

Because it...

scared the living BEJEEBIES out of me!

Not many things scare me...except maybe children hiding in the tall corn in the field by my house who like to stalk me at dusk while I walk...and night creatures that rustle the grass and bushes making it difficult for me to hear the children stalking me through the corn...and bats that swoop my head.

But THIS venomous thing that slithered right next to my son's bare feet hissing before sliding into the pit by the basement window is totally the winner! Now I'm out there in my nightie and underpants and flip flops with this adrenaline pumping and I do the logical thing. I grabbed the only shovel I could find (it was a short one) and without any regard for my own safety, I brought it down on this snake while it was under the leaves. When it came out from under the leaves I recognized it. It's a nasty Cotton Mouth. But I'm this tough ol' country girl, right?

Yeah.

So.

I put on a pair of blue jeans and my boots that come up to my knees because, HEY this thing is poisonous. I'm on the phone with my friend's husband and I go borrow a long handled shovel from another friend's house (because the one I had was just too short) and I'm holding this shovel in the air ready to strike and I freeze in fear and these tears pop into my eyes.

Uh. No. My KID is watching. And I'm this tough ol' country girl. Right?

So I walk away (the snake is still in the pit just hanging...evidently I had hurt it pretty bad) and I take this deep breath and still my racing heart. I get back into position and I totally freeze up. This thing just scared the living crap out of me.

So my girlfriend's husband drove twenty minutes to my house to save me from the venomous snake.

Because I'm a tough ol' country girl who's afraid of the Children of the Corn, night creatures in the grass, bats that swoop my head, and poisonous snakes.

Blackberries! Blackberries!

YES! That is our household chant! There are many wild blackberry bushes completely ladened with almost ripe blackberries! In about a week they'll be juicy and ripe.

Jam!

Conserves!

Preserves!

Pie Filling!

Chunky Pancake Syrup!

OH MY!!!

What I did a week ago Saturday

Any questions?

Creative Writing Time

The DIVA had a recent post about observations in the city. I liked the way she did it so I decided to right my own observations of my country life in the same style and order, just for fun. I hope a few others might do the same and let me know so I can go read it (or you can post it in the comments section).

Owls calling out their territory, wolves howling at the moon in the background, the toads and frogs making their presence know with their deep croaking. My nightly music sung to me by nature.

I look up into the clear country sky, left dark by the lack of city lights, and I see more stars than I ever imagined! I breath in the cool crisp clean air while my dogs sit at my feet and the cat rubs up against my leg. The chickens are all roosting in their coops and the goats are asleep in the barn.

Such sweet serenity surrounds me!

Because I Sell Eggs ***UPDATED***

According to THIS study, men who eat seven or more eggs a week were "associated with a 23 percent greater risk of death."

Now, call me CRAZY, but aren't we all pretty much guaranteed a 100% chance of death? I mean, it's one of the things in life that we can all count on. Isn't it?!

Gilligan's New Pets

You really need to have your speakers on to get the full effect.

I Love Chickens!

I'm going to build a few of these. I need one for each breed of chicken that I have so I can have pure-breed chicks. Isn't it adorable?! I found it at MyPetChicken.com. They sell chicken diapers. No joke...

I'm Just Sick

Tinkerbelle is dead. Max, my basset/beagel mix, is dead. We had thought that on my birthday Max ripped into the chicken house, but Bear didn't see them do it. Now, we have the chicken, the dog and this evening my baby goat.

Well, the dogs have been going crazy the last several weeks chasing something off. I've thought they've been chasing off a coyote or raccon. This morning I went out to see what they were barking at. It was another damned pit bull. It's black with brown brindle and a red collar. It's someone's pet. The animal control officer said that is sounded like more than just little coincidence that my dogs had been chasing something off, three animals show up dead, and here's this dog around that's not been seen before.

The dog warden, White Boy and I all went dog hunting this morning. One of our dogs that had squared off with the pit earlier had the scent in the snow, but lost it. I'm going to find this dog and I'm going to shoot it. I'm going to kill this animal. Aside from having to protect my other animals, I have to protect my children. What if they get in the way of this dog and one of it's intended kills? What if they become it's intended kill?

I'm just sick, sick, sick.

What is WRONG with people?! Pit bulls are not fun loving dogs. They're killers. And some fool is letting their dog run free and it's killing my family pets. Even if it isn't a pit bull, you do not let your dog run foot loose and fancy free. It's WRONG.

I'm just so tired of this crap. I'm really fighting succumbing to the depression I feel all around me.

I'd like to introduce Tinkerbelle.

I named her that because of the way her ears flop. They make me think of fairy wings. Plus she has a bit of yellow in her fur. It reminded me of pixie dust.

Here she is with her Ma-ma. They have the exact same coloring, even down to the grey on her front knees. The shape of her face though is like her Daddy's.

I think that it is the most beautiful thing watching a mother feed her baby. When I see something as amazing as this I just can't understand how people can believe that these things came to be through a freak accident that happened in the vast universe. There HAS to be a Creator to design something as intricate as pregnancy and motherhood!!!

Here is the proud Pa-pa. It's a corn cob he's chewed all the corn off of. Just seeing him with it in his mouth like that was reminiscent of a new Dad smoking a cigar. Made me laugh!

Let's All Sing Together Now

Happy birthday to you,
Happy birthday to you,
Happy birthday dear, Krystal-who's-dogs-broke-into-the-chicken-coop-and-ran-off-two-chickens-you-later-rescued-before-breaking-up-a-cock-fight-in-the-other-chicken-coop-during-which-you-were-stabbed-by-one-of-the-cocks-but-you-just-pulled-its-tallen-out-of-your-hand-while-the-bird-was-hanging-upside-down!
Happy birthday to you!

I got my mojo back! Krystal's groove is back on!

And it's about freaking TIME! It's been two LONG weeks since the accident and today I am THIRTY-SEVEN...yes 37-years-old! And anyone who believes two 17-year-olds who were speeding through a school zone over a 37-year-old mother of five who's been driving for 22 years is a gullible fool!

I'm back!

Yeah!

I'm back!

Yeah!

I'm wearing my boots!

Yeah!

And my hat!

Yeah!

With a chicken feather in it!

Woot! Woot! And a cockle-doodle-doo!